We’ve made it to 2013!
With this particular New Year, there continue to be changes that I constantly ask myself if I am ready for. Of course the question, can I handle being an adult? I am only 24 after all and the answer’s still undecided, but I’m leaning to the positive. I miss the days of being a student, though they are not long past. I miss the days where my biggest responsibility was to finish assessments and to fit in the required reading. I miss when I had spare time to see friends all day, and all night, and even when doing work, they were still around. I miss my parents taking care of the hard stuff like bills and what’s for dinner.
Now, this thing they call adulthood, sees me spending more time on my own. I’ve moved into my own flat. I’m now the only one responsible for accomplishing personal goals. There are no tutors telling me to write. No school assigned writer’s workshops where we’re required to submit writing constantly. And read constantly.
It’s only me. It’s up to me. And, that means I am the only one who can really let myself down now.
So, no pressure really.
In the past year, I’ve accomplished more than I intended. Yes, my M.A. Yes, my life in London. But the people I’ve found! Some of the greatest people I’ve had in my life! And, the strength in myself that actually makes my life harder as I now choose the path that offers challange. I now have a better understanding of what I want and need from life, and when in my grasp, I will hold on as tightly as I can.
2012, for me, has been a year to learn, discover and build myself.
2013, will be the time to put it all to practice.
After 30 March, I have no idea on what continent I will live. I’ve already decided that if London will not accept me for the moment, then I will not surrender my love of experience and to return to what is familiar. My hopes, and wishes are that a job that can offer me the Tier 2 Sponsorship will happen in the next few months so I can remain in the United Kingdom. If not, it will become my intention to teach English in either Spain, France, Korea or Vietnam. Or possibly become a flight attendant, even with my fear of flying. My constant gift to myself will be the chance to grow and there’s no place better than in a place unfamiliar.
All the better to keep writing with my dears.
Anyway, it comes to this in 2013 – If I can’t settle where I want, then I refuse to settle. I still have the desire and energy to keep fighting for the lifestyle and the decisions that will make me happy. It’s my life and I refuse to take it easy when it comes to my ambitions.
Wishing the best for everyone in 2013!! However, please don’t get too caught in the ‘fresh start‘ or ‘this year better than the last‘ business. Any day can give you a fresh start, and you should take advantage of them.
Today is the day you have to make a decision.
Yesterday is gone.
Tomorrow is still out of reach.
Today’s the day.
xx, Kristin
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